On Gardening and Growing Big Little Things...

Although I am a much more present and patient mother for Isabella than I was over a decade ago for Joe and Mads when they were babies, I will fully admit that I am still not a mother who was made to mother babies.

I know what some people are going to say - that no one is ever really prepared for motherhood, that mostly all of us do the best we can, and all that kind of stuff we say with the best of intentions to comfort and assuage those others of us who just aren't quite as gifted or inclined toward caring for the littlest ones.

fresh thyme

But I am TOTALLY ok with the fact that that I am much more naturally amenable, capable, and competent a mother for slightly older children.

That's not to say that I am not very much enjoying and learning to appreciate what it is to be a new mother again at 40, but learning is the key word here. I have talent for some things, and that talent has certainly bumped the learning curve on the things at which I'm gifted, but this mothering babies thing - well, I am always trying and learning. Specially the whole how to stay at home full time while mothering a little baby. That staying successfully, happily and fulfilled-ly at home full time with a baby thing - that is taking a lot of trying and learning.

And one of the things it's teaching me this time around, because I'm so much more ready to learn it, is a sense of wonderment and accomplishment from the "little" things (that we know are much bigger but are probably so named because we can miss them in the blink of an eye if we're not paying attention...).

as yet unidentified white bulb flower

Watching Izzy conquer her baby milestones, being here to witness the glee and pride in her big two-toofed, squirrel-cheeked, ear-to-ear grin, and realizing how blessed I am to have the chance to do it better this time than I did the last - that's a big little thing for me.

Being able to remind myself in a moment of utterly sleep-deprived and exhausted frustration when I think she's being a little nutjob baby how fortunate we are that she is healthy enough to be a nutjob baby - another big little thing.

And finding other ways, while I am however temporarily away from the paid in money work force, to derive a sense of fulfillment, achievement, evolution, purpose and productivity, to feed the pieces of me that don't answer when called "Mom," "Mommy," "Mother," or "Mama" - a truly big, essential, and sanity-saving little thing.

But the mind can only handle so much of the active and sometimes taxing - albeit rewarding- cerebral engagement it takes to write and photograph a recipe worth cooking or a blog post worth reading. And that whole domestic maintenance thing, while necessary, gets old from time to time...

Enter gardening.

resuscitated blueberry bush

A thing I never imagined in my much more impatient younger life that I would ever care to explore.

And yet it seems such a natural progression in my life at this juncture when I've finally learned to slow down, smell the roses, and be ok with doing my best and letting the rest unfold, not trying to control the uncontrollable, predict the unpredictable, or know the unknowable.

Better understanding both my abilities and limitations than I would have ten years ago, I've started out small. Just a few plants in the ground and a few more in pots.

the Christmas cactus that keeps on giving

And when I see new leaves sprouting on a blueberry bush I thought I'd killed, new little nodes on my Christmas cactus, a whole blanket of tiny thyme leaves coming in where I'd cut it back completely, new spearmint leaves growing like weeds just days after I've picked and eaten all the existing ones, and two new blossoms opening on some white bulb flower I transplanted from the side yard to the front, a big, huge, ear-to-ear, two-toofed, squirrel-cheeked grin wells up in the heart of my once black thumb.

That I get to share these big little milestones with y'all makes it all the sweeter.

Next up, it's four little garden beds for veg.

We're growing more big little things, a little at a time. :)

shinae

Choh Gochoojahng (aka Cho Gochujang)

Before I get into choh gochoojahng, I just want to say it never ceases to surprise me how many hits I get from people looking for "how to cook sand fleas."

And if cooking sand fleas isn't exactly something I want to be known for, I am super tickled to know how many accidental readers out there share my culinary curiosity and sense of adventure.

That said, Little Asian Mama and Medium Asian Papa are visiting this weekend, and they always come bearing something delicious to eat. Tonight, it's hweh (aka hwae), or Korean style sashimi - specifically mirugai (geoduck) and halibut (gwahng uh in Korean) tonight.

If the Japanese enjoy their sashimi with shoyu and or wasabi, Koreans dip our fish in something called choh gochoojahng. Literally vinegar (choh) red chili pepper paste (gochoojahng), this dipping sauce is hot, sweet, tangy and savory from the gochoojahng, sugar, vinegar and garlic, respectively.

This is also the sauce you get when you order hweh dup bahp (Korean style chirashizushi), and it's delicious for dipping raw cucumber, lettuce leaves, and mild chili peppers as well.

CHOH GOCHOOJAHNG (aka cho gochujang) 

- 1/4 cup gochoojahng

- 2 Tablespoons water

- 1 to 1.5 Tablespoons sugar, depending on how sweet you like your food

- 1.5  to 2 Tablespoons white vinegar

- 1/2 Tablespoon soy sauce

- 1 teaspoon finely minced garlic (1 small clove)

Just put all the ingredients in a bowl and slowly stir or whisk to thoroughly mix and incorporate all the ingredients.

You want to go slow because the gochoojahng is really pasty at first and if you try to stir or whisk too quickly, you'll end up sloshing and spilling all the other liquid before the gochoojahng starts to thin out.

Now off to make a little ssahmjahng (seasoned fermented soybean paste) and prep all the greens for the rest of dinner. Another distinguishing feature of Korean hweh is that we often wrap our fish with things like lettuce, perilla and other tender leafy greens, a thin slice of garlic, and a dab of the sauce.

Healthful and so delicious. Next time you've got raw fish on the brain, you might want to go Korean style. :)

shinae

Hotter Than It Looks Thai Inspired Curry Base

Last night, we had shrimp, shrooms, and snow peas with which to make dinner, and The Man said he wanted something spicy, to which I mused aloud how I've noticed that people who tend to say, "Oh, that's spicy!" in response to eating something hot usually don't have a high tolerance for capsaicin heat.

To which The Man responded, "OK. Make something HOT."

So I did. :P

HOTTER THAN IT LOOKS THAI INSPIRED CURRY BASE

Serves 4 with about 1 pound of protein and 1 pound of veg added, served with steamed rice

*Caveat: For most people, this recipe will be unbearably HOT. You can easily turn down the heat by reducing the chilies. If you've a mild palate, start out with one fresh chili - maybe even a milder one like jalapeno - seeded and deveined and 1 teaspoon crushed chili flakes

I was originally going to write this up as a complete recipe including the proteins and veg (which I do outline for you further down this post), but I realized this morning that this makes a good and adaptable base to which you can add whatever proteins and veg you fancy.

Add 4 or 5 cups of unsalted chicken, seafood or veg stock, increase the salt and lime to taste, and you'll have a delicious soup!

- 1/4 yellow onion, finely minced
- 1/4 cup very finely chopped cilantro and/or basil (This is a great use for all those stems!)
- 2 Tablespoons finely minced ginger
- 2 Tablespoons finely minced garlic
- 3 serrano chilies, finely minced (seeds, veins and all) Thai bird chilies would be great, of course, but I had serranos. Chiles de arbol would also work well here.
- 1 Tablespoon crushed red chili flakes (Crushed red chili flakes are a way to add a fairly clean and unadulterated heat to your dishes without adding too much competing or distinct chili flavor.)
- the zest of 1 lime (or 3 kaffir lime leaves - I just used the lime zest because I didn't have the leaves handy. Lemon balm is also a great sub for kaffir lime leaves. Lemongrass would also add a similarly floral citrus element.)
- 2 Tablespoons oil
- 1 to 2 teaspoons curry powder, depending on how strong a curry flavor you prefer
- 1 Tablespoon fish sauce
- 1 Tablespoon lime juice
- 1 teaspoon kosher salt
- 1 teaspoon sugar
- 1 can of coconut milk (they're usually somewhere between 13 and 15 ounces)

1) In a preheated medium high pan, saute the aromatics - onion, garlic, ginger, chilies, chili flakes, and lime zest - in the 2 Tablespoons of oil until the onions are translucent. Add the curry powder, stir to incorporate, and let the curry bloom for a minute or so.

2) Add the remainder of the ingredients and stir to incorporate thoroughly, turn the heat up to high, and bring the curry to an active boil for a minute.

3) Add in your protein and veg and bring the curry back up to a boil for a minute or so, turn the heat down to medium high, and let it simmer, uncovered, for 5 minutes, or until your protein is cooked through. Bite sized pieces of seafood will take no time at all (3 to 5 minutes), white meat chicken a little bit longer (5 to 7 minutes), and dark meat yet longer (7 to 10 minutes).

4) Give it a stir, adjust the seasoning if needed - a little more salt or fish sauce if you want it saltier, a little more lime juice if you like extra tang, maybe a pinch more of sugar to round out all the flavors - simmer another minute or two, and that's it! Serve with steamed rice.

For last night's curry, I added:

- 1 pound shrimp, peeled and deveined (I used 31/40 size), lightly sauteed
- 1/2 pound button or crimini mushrooms, quartered and sauteed
- 1/2 pound snow peas, stems removed and lightly blanched and shocked if you have the time. If you don't, it's not a huge deal, but blanching and shocking does help them retain color and crunch
- 1/2 red bell pepper cut into 1/4-inch strips, sauteed
- a .8 oz can (the short one) of bamboo shoots, drained

But you can of course use whatever veg you like and have handy, following the general measurement guidelines of 1 pound of protein and 1 pound of veg for 4 servings.

You don't have to saute/blanch the protein and veg as outlined above, but I like how it helps them retain their color and texture when they simmer in the curry.

Enjoy! :)

shinae

Complete album HERE.

THANK YOU

Truth is, I never envisioned myself a Stay-at-Home mom.

And contrary to how many of my SAHM sistren on the interwebs make it look, it is often a difficult and lonely kind of job, despite the many intrinsic rewards.

Truth also is that I might not be one today, or at least I'd be much more reluctantly so, were it not for the camaraderie, support, encouragement, friendship, conversation, and creative outlet I have here, because of you.

And that makes doing what I do all the more fulfilling, rewarding, and truthfully, EASIER.

So THANK YOU is all. :)

shinae

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY :)

We need not vilify, deify, idealize, sanctify, or canonize our mothers. Let's let them be human like we are and love them as much as they love us anyway.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ANYONE WHO LOVES SOMEONE LIKE A MOTHER WOULD.

With love,

shinae

Mother's Day Eve Chicken & Waffles

I always tell the Monsters that they don't need to buy me gifts. And I mean that sincerely. But I will always be more than happy to cook with them, which is gift enough for me. 

+Dean Robinson Izzysat while Joey and I made the Chicken and Waffles (storebought frozen Belgian waffles today, and my fried chicken recipe) and Mads and I worked together on our Broccoli Raisin Slawlad.

Two timers went off on Joey at the same time - the last batch of chicken and the waffles in the oven - and he learned yet another valuable kitchen lesson today: Whatever you do, DON'T PANIC, and just do what you can, trying to remember which is more urgent. In this case, the waffles were more urgent than the fried chicken because we didn't want them to go from perfectly done to crispy, so I helped him out by taking the waffles out of the oven while he fished the last of the chicken out of the oil.

The rest of them went for gravy instead of maple, I went for both, and Joey, the kid who drinks Worcestershire out of the bottle when he thinks I'm not looking, looked at me like I'm weird. 

Cooking with my kids, eating fried chicken with the whole family, drinking a cold beer... HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY EVE TO ME. :)

shinae

Full album HERE.

Gadgets Schmadgets - Kitchen Towel Salad Spinner

When I taught cooking classes, I had a super cool regular client named Kathy with a fabulously tricked out kitchen overlooking the water that I absolutely LOVED cooking in. Kathy was a retired attorney turned budding fiction writer who discovered a love of cooking, and kitchen gadgets, later in life.

I have fond memories of showing her how to steam a whole fish, grill a perfectly medium rare butterflied leg of lamb and cook a Vietnamese dinner for 10, me armed with my apron and a 5 dollar Kiwi cleaver, and she with an armory of gadgets to fill her own little corner of Williams-Sonoma. 

One of the things I loved about cooking with Kathy is that while she thoroughly enjoyed utilizing her kitchen gadgets, she clearly did not believe they were necessary for good cooking (or she certainly wouldn't have kept hiring me). It's almost as if they fulfilled a separate interest for doodads and mechanisms that was happily coincidental with the making of a meal.

I would roll a lime and cut 4 flat pieces of it around the core before squeezing (because that cut gets more juice out of the fruit than a wedge cut), while she would reach into the drawer for her citrus reamer. I would smash the garlic clove on the cutting board with my cleaver to remove the skin while she would roll it around in her garlic peeler tube thingamajig. I would then mince the garlic with the same cleaver while she worked it through a garlic press.

We had a peaceful coexistence and cooperation in that kitchen despite our diametrically opposed views on the usefulness of most kitchen gadgets. But I have a feeling Kathy might be thoroughly unhappy to cook in my comparatively Spartan kitchen. This is not to say I don't have a handful of gadgets whose purpose I deem unique or efficient but essential and otherwise irreplaceable enough to warrant their purchase (think microplane, food processor, vegetable peeler...). I just steer very clear of single purpose gadgets, particularly those that take lots of room. (Wait, I think I've mentioned this before.)

So while Kathy would break out her futuristic looking stainless steel salad spinner to dry the arugula that was going to top our Delmonico steak, I would be reaching for a clean kitchen towel. Because a clean kitchen towel, in addition to drying hands and dishes, holding a cutting board in place and acting as a makeshift potholder among other things, also makes a most excellent salad spinner which also happens not to take up a whole cubic foot of space in anyone's kitchen.

How To Spin Your Salad In A Dishrag...

1) Place your washed greens in the center of a clean kitchen towel.

spring greens on kitchen towel

2) Gather the sides and corners of the towel and hold them together in your fist so it looks like a beggar's purse. (The fisted technique is essential as any other hold will likely result in airborne salad.)

3) Take that puppy outside, away from windows, and give it a good 50 consecutive whirls in the same direction or until beads of water are no longer flying about your perimeter. This creates the same centrifugal force that a salad spinner would and dries your greens without jostling and damaging them.

4) !Voila! Spun salad, $30+ bucks happily spent (or saved) elsewhere, and a whole cubic foot of storage/counter space better left to things like a blender or your cat.

Did I mention I was...

...ridiculous???

shinae

Shrimp Enchiladas with Guajillo Sauce (aka Mex & Margi Date Night @ Home)

The Man LOVES Mexican food.

And I used to make it for him much more often until that rotten baby came along. :P

It takes time to make a proper chile sauce, and guacamole, and rice, and beans, and we can't remember the last time we've had a truly good night's sleep, so cooking hasn't been all that involved lately.

This is how we frame shots when we are both
sleep deprived and starving...

But even if we can't get away from the babyparenting gig long enough for a proper date just yet, I figured I'd make him some somewhat proper Mexican food at home as a way to do something for us. 

Because Mex & Margis for some reason always seem to feed the most relaxed conversation and a real sense of QT. As much as we love to eat and drink all kinds of other stuff, this is just our thing.

Our menu tonight made with what was on hand:

- Shrimp Enchiladas with Guajillo Sauce
- Jasmine "Mexican" Rice
- Refried Black and Butter Beans topped with Feta Cheese (I find Feta to be a pretty decent substitute for queso fresco - hits those creamy, tangy, salty notes, and many of us are likely to have it on hand)
- Guacamole

Dean's contribution - margis, of course.

We don't have room for margi glasses in our lives.
Barely enough room for the bottles. :P

And with Izzy behaving fairly well for us at the dinner table, that was a lovely midweek date night in.

We need to do that more often. 

shinae

Full album HERE.

Kohng Goohksoo (aka Kongguksu) with Soba

If you've ever been to Korea in the summer, you know the heat and humidity are oppressive. And one of the ways to combat that heat and humidity is to cool yourself from the inside with food.

You might already be familiar with a cold buckwheat noodle dish called naengmyun which is often served with crushed ice in the clear beef broth to cool and refresh. A lesser known but equally refreshing summer cool-down meal is kohng goohksoo, literally soybean (milk) noodles.

A simple dish composed of nothing but lightly salted fresh pressed soybean milk, sohmyun noodles (thin white noodles), julienned cucumber, toasted sesame seeds, and a little bit of chopped green onion. Just reading the ingredient list you can tell it's simple, light, nutty, toasty and refreshing.

And because it's so simple and mild, you have to have a bowl of perfectly ripened kimchi on the side to provide a little of that salty/spicy/crunchy/tangy contrast with every bite.

A chopsticksful of noodles, followed by a piece of kimchi, followed by a big swig of that cool soybean milk right from the bowl... MMMMM & AAAAAH. :)

I didn't have Korean sohmyun noodles on hand today so I used my Japanese soba, and I have to say the nuttiness of the buckwheat only added to the dish. I might never go back to sohmyun for this dish again. 

Full album HERE.

shinae

P.S. +Gomo cHowDivine Thanks for putting the craving and post idea in my head! :) Her healthy, delicious  and elegant blog HERE.

Me Time

In an absolutely foolish but absolutely necessary act of rebellion against the good sense that tells me to sleep while the child does, I am brewing myself a full pot of coffee at 2:40 AM and stealing the next two or three hours of the kind of solitude a mother can only get when the household sleeps deeply.

I love that this pic makes me look like I ride broomsticks
and eat small children for dinner after I've braised them
in my cauldron.

And I am doing nothing designed or intended to be productive, responsible, forward thinking or useful.

And I am blocking that person who's been intermittently getting under my skin for months. One of those people who seems to get much more out of their interaction with me than I do with them and who makes my gut twitch half the time they express themselves to me, even without the most solid empirical evidence to support it. I am going to stop agonizing over whether I'm being fair to them so I can be good to myself. Because they are not my child, lover, parent, sibling or friend. Because they do not matter.

I am also letting this mess sit and not allowing myself a moment of that feeling of obligation to do something about it.

I am sitting here, being me, being awake, being useless and letting my mind be awake while my body wants to sleep because that is what I really, really want to do, here and now.

Adrenaline, be my friend today.

shinae

Oven Roasted Green Beans with Garlic Oyster Sauce

Green beans (aka String Beans aka Snap Beans) are super high in fiber and Vitamins A & C, among other nutrients. Here's a delicious and fun Asian-inspired finger food recipe that easily gets my big monsters eating half a pound of them each.

Oven Roasted Green Beans with Garlic Oyster Sauce
Serves 4 as a side

A fun kid and family friendly veg dish that my big monsters can't get enough of. :)

- 1 pound green beans, washed, dried, stems removed
- 1.5 Tablespoons oil

Sauce

- 3 Tablespoons oyster sauce
- 1 Tablespoon minced garlic
- 2/3 to 1 Tablespoon honey, depending on how sweet you like your food
- 1/2 Tablespoon water
- 1/8 teaspoon black pepper

1) Preheat oven to 425F.

2) Toss the green beans with the 1.5 Tablespoons oil to thoroughly coat each green bean and spread evenly in a single layer on a half sheet pan.

3) Roast green beans for 8 minutes on middle rack of oven. While you're waiting, combine the sauce ingredients in a bowl and stir to mix thoroughly.

4) After 8 minutes, take the beans out of the oven, pour the sauce over them and gently stir to coat. Make sure to put the beans back in a single layer on the sheet pan.

5) Put the beans back on the top rack of the oven and roast another 2 to 2.5 minutes.

6) Serve beans on a platter with the remaining pan sauce drizzled on top.  Toasted sesame seeds are also a super cute and yummy garnish, but Joe and Mads aren't having any of that... YET. :)

I usually serve them up in a big bowl or platter, and we all pick 'em up with our grubby fangers and munch away, but you can totally serve them as part of a plated meal to be eaten with forks (or chopsticks).

Enjoy!

shinae

P.S. That sauce that clings to the bottom of your dish is really yummy with steamed rice. ^^

P.P.S. Quick Tip: Sometimes it's hard measuring out thicker condiments in measuring spoons because they cling when you try to pour them out. A quick swirl of vegetable or olive oil in your measuring spoon (or cup) will make it super easy for the stuff to slide right out and you're all set for your next one!

Full cooking album HERE.

Gold Nugget Tangerines

As you might already know, I am always all about trying new (to me) produce, so when I came across these Gold Nugget Tangerines at the market yesterday, I picked up a couple to see what they were about.

Turns out they're a cross between two tangerine varieties - Wilking and Kincy - and are named for the nugget texture of the bumpy rind.

As you can see, the pulp is large as tangerines go, and the fruit is sweet and juicy, tasting of the best Navel Orange you've ever had, but with the peelability and slightly less dense texture of a loose rind tangerine. Neat and delicious eating, unlike, say, Honey Tangerines, which are messy and delicious.

Like them. A lot. Will have to buy more for the big Monsters this weekend.

shinae

P.S. Full album HERE.

Soaked Soybeans & Memories of 할머니...

I'd had these dry soybeans, or 콩 (pronounced KOHNG) in Korean, for over a year when I was taking inventory of my pantry last night and unearthed them.

So I decided I'd make some soymilk with them and make 콩비지찌개 (KOHNGbiji JJIgeh), a stew made with the solids, from the byproduct, which requires soaking/reconstituting, as with any dish made with dry beans.

And when I gave them a stir just now to remove the outer casings and smelled that distinctly green and nutty smell of dry soybeans soaking, I was immediately taken back to being in elementary school and helping my paternal grandmother (할머니 - pronounced HAHLmuhnee) pick the dud beans out of the batch so she could sprout the rest in cheesecloths in an old, broken washing machine to grow soybean sprouts (콩나물 - KOHNGnahmool).

My father's mother, probably from some combination of talent and poverty, had the greenest thumb I've ever known. She could grow anything, and she would collect rainwater in trash cans to water her plants and wash her hair because she thought it was best. (Let's just say I did not inherit her green thumb, but I think I did inherit my sense of frugality from her.)

할머니 passed away years ago at the ripe old age of something that was really close to a hundred, and I don't have that many fond memories of her to be honest - probably some combination of my feisty personality and what seemed to me her preference for the male children in the family (not uncommon for women of her culture and time) - but that's one of them. And we should all take all the fond memories we can get, I think. :)

shinae